smoke, smoke, smoke

I want a god damn smoke. It's been 2 weeks and I want one with every single part of my mind and body. I want to inhale it in and feel it take me over and make me feel perfect and shitty all at once. Love that. It's better than cookies. It's better than alcohol. It's better than anything I've ever known. And that is a total lie. It's not really that perfect. I just want it to be. I want to have one and to have it make me feel way better. Wy can't I ever get what I want? Temper tantrum time.