tramp

FYI. I'm a dating tramp, whore, slut. Yep. It's official. I date a lot and I let just about anyone kiss me. Why the heck not? I like most people. I like kissing. Why not go out with them and kiss them even though there is no future? Yep. That's me: easy, easy, easy. What else is there to say about it? Wait, don't think I'm going around sleeping with all these guys. That, I am NOT doing. But I'm a little nervous that if I was presented with that opportunity, I might just do it because it's better than the alternative, right? Or maybe not. No, it's not. But seriously, I should probably be better at turning down people that are not right for me. It's a waste of everyone's time and it is totally against everything I want out of someone else. I need to stop being a damn hypocrite and be honest. Why is it so difficult to reject people? The first couple people I rejected were simple. But NOW, now I can't seem to say no to anyone. I think maybe it's because I've seen how horrible some people are so even the remotest bit of niceness has got me feeling like I should give the guy a shot. Stupid. I cannot date someone who does not or cannot fly. I cannot date someone who does not drink at all. I cannot date someone who tells me all about their mental instability on a first date. I appreciate the honesty men, but I don't want to take care of you. And that's what I will do. I will try to make you better and convince you that there is not such thing as mental illness. You will resent me. Vice-versa. So yeah, no more of that. Right? Right.

Tonight I'm going out with a perfectly smart, sane and interesting guy. We are going out and doing cool things that I've been wanting to do. We're going to the Walker, were going for a nice dinner, and we're going to see Bluegrass. Now that is a good date with a good guy. Now let's just hope I can get past my feeling like he's too good and proper for  me. Such weird hang ups I have.

I have 3 finals next week so it's going to be a crazy couple of days. I'm tired already. And I am fat. Grrr. I wish I could get to the gym but I don't know that there is time. I need to ditch work. Yes, that sounds like a plan. I could really use something pretty to wear too. There are never enough hours in the damn day. I cannot wait until December 18 and the end of school for a bit. Did I mention I may be heading to Costa Rica? I know! Ok, back to work. Back to work.

Reciting mantra: I will not be a dating whore. I will not be a dating whore.